Lex and Eric Allred: Asher Eric Allred

So this post is very long, I am warning you. I had to make sure I got everything documented for our own personal reasons though. So here you go, the story of the most exciting/terrifying/emotional/tiring/wonderful/best day of our lives! :)

At exactly 5 AM on September 24th 2012, I woke up to my water breaking in bed. I laid there for a minute trying to decide if this was really happening. I didn’t feel any contractions but after a minute or two I realized I definitely wasn’t peeing my pants so it had to be the real deal!

I woke Eric up and we got everything ready and headed to the hospital (after stopping at McDonalds for breakfast of course! haha!)

We got to the hospital around 6 AM and got checked in and assigned to the most amazing nurse, Tressa. I was dilated to a 5 and having super regular contractions! Within the hour I had dilated to a 6 and was told that I would have a baby within a couple of hours. Baylee guessed that he would be born at 10:33 AM and our nurse just laughed and told us that if he was, I would have one of the luckiest labors she had ever seen!

Just relaxin in labor haha!

My pain wasn't too bad but the anesthesiologist was just about to go in for back to back c-sections and so I had the option to get my epidural then or in about 2 hours when he had finished with the 2 scheduled c-sections. They warned me that if I waited the 2 hours I would probably be dilated to an 8 and in the most painful part of my labor so if I wanted to avoid being in pain they suggested I get the epidural then.

I got my epidural at 8 AM and my contractions slowed wayyy down. I stopped dilating and everything kind of just paused so they decided to give me some pitocin to get my labor back to the speed it had been at naturally. My body, however, reacted to the pitocin super strongly and I started having really strong, irregular, contractions that were lasting 3-4 minutes each.

My whole family was sitting in my room and were all just laughing and talking when Tressa came in to check me. She mentioned that the baby's heart rate had been really low for about 2 minutes so they were going to have me roll over to try and get him off of his umbilical cord and boost his heart rate. We all kept talking and Tressa helped me roll from side to side a few times. She then told us that his heart rate wasn't going up and that if it didn't go up in the next minute we would have to get prepped for an emergency c-section.

She sounded so calm about it that I just kind of brushed it off, assuming that his heart rate would go back up and everything would be fine.

A minute passed and all of the sudden my family was being rushed out of my room and about 12 nurses were running in. They stopped my pitocin in an attempt to get one of my weird contractions to stop and started gathering things and bringing in another bed and all sorts of commotion.

I had nurses grabbing my arms and legs, strapping an oxygen mask to my face, and one nurse shaking my stomach. They flipped me over onto my hands and knees and lifted me onto a different bed. They paged Dr. Bierer for an emergency c-section and I looked over to see one of the nurses dressing Eric in the surgical scrubs.

All of this happened within 2 minutes of Tressa walking in to check me and my emotions couldn’t figure out what to do. I was scared out of my mind but Baylee was standing right by the door so I was trying really hard to not get panicked and cry but by the time they were rolling me into the next room I couldn't hold it in anymore. I knew Eric was just as scared and was trying to stay strong for me and that my family was all praying for me as they watched me get wheeled away so I kept my head down and only let a few tears escape.

They got us into the room and got me all prepped for surgery and were just about to start the procedure when one of the nurses yelled that his heart rate was stabilizing. By this time tears were flowing pretty heavily and the sense of relief I felt didn’t help this. Everything was okay and I would be able to have my baby just as I had planned. Or so I thought.

Dr. Bierer explained to Eric and I that at this point we had the option to wait it out and try to go through the rest of the labor process but he warned us that Asher was not responding well to my body's pattern of labor and if we did wait, Asher's heart rate was almost guaranteed to drop again and the chances of them being able to stabilize it a second time were very low. He said they would still be able to perform an emergency c-section if that happened but it would be rushed and risky for both me and the baby. He then told us that he would personally suggest to just continue with the c-section while we were there since for the moment everything was stable and they could continue at the pace they preferred.

Part of me just wanted to wake up from this bad dream and go back 5 minutes when everything was normal. I didn’t want to have a c-section. I wanted to go through the natural delivery process, I wanted Eric to be able to cut the cord, I wanted my baby to placed on my chest right after he was born, not whisked away by nurses and doctors, I wanted to feel the sense of accomplishment that comes from the hard work of giving birth, not be numbed and have the doctors do everything. This side of me wanted to tell the doctor to go away, that I was going to do things the way they are supposed to happen. Luckily, however, the logical side of me (and my frantic, panicked, worried husband) told the doctor to do what was safe.

We agreed to whatever the doctor recommended and so they proceeded with the c-section. It was the weirdest thing I had ever felt. My eyes kept rolling back in my head and Eric would get panicked and ask me if I was okay. I didn’t feel delirious or loopy, and I was trying so hard to keep my eyes open to help Eric feel better but I physically couldn’t help it. Mentally I was fine. I could hear everything that was going on and was very much aware of what was happening but physically I felt like I was falling apart.

I heard the doctor’s count and felt someone push on my stomach with all their strength. They repeated the process a second time and all the air in my lungs was pushed out and the pressure in my stomach suddenly was gone. I knew that my baby was born and I listened for any noise. I was being a paranoid mom after everything that had happened but I couldn’t hear anything and thanks to the sheet they had put up for the procedure I couldn’t see anything either. I was sure something was wrong and no one was telling me what was going on. It felt like 5 minutes passed (Eric later told me that I truly was being a paranoid mom and that 20 seconds was much more accurate!) before I heard it. The sweet scream I had been waiting for. A little foot was lifted above the sheet and I heard the nurses say “Look at all that red hair!” My silent tears turned into violent sobs and nurses started rushing to my side asking me if I was okay. I tried to choke out that I was just too happy, with very little success. Luckily Tressa could interpret my tears and told the nurses I was fine. My baby was less than a minute old and all I had seen of him was a tiny foot and I already knew that I loved him more than anything and that he was truly perfect.

Tressa came over and looked at me. She had tears running down her face, which panicked me at first. She grabbed my shoulder and said “You did amazing. I have never had anyone handle such a scary thing so bravely before. He is perfect mom. You should be so proud of yourself; I know that me and everyone else in this room are.” This just made me more emotional.

Eric carried him over and with tears in his eyes, leaned forward to kiss me. He told me he was so proud of me and asked if I was okay. He held up our sweet baby for me to see and said “He is so beautiful and the doctors said he is healthy and perfect.” Everything around me just kind of stopped and I looked at the perfect baby in my husband’s arms trying to wrap my brain around the fact that I made that! That the past 9 months of work, swollen feet, back pains, and heart burn were over and I realized that I would take everything I went through a million times over to be able to look at my little family and realize what life is all about. I had never felt such joy before and I think that must be why my body was convulsing so badly. (The nurses later told me, the rush of hormones is actually what makes you look like you are having a seizure, but that fact that I was hysterical at the time didn’t help it either haha!) Eric then said something that brought just a little bit of humor into this crazy emotional moment and that I will never let him live down haha! “And look Lex, he has orange hair! Tons of it!” I tried not to laugh but when Dr. Bierer scoffed and said “Orange hair, eh?? Do you mean red?” I couldn’t help but start giggling in between my sobs haha!

Our perfect baby boy was born at 10:40 AM (Baylee got the blame for all the awful stress since she guessed he would be born at 10:33 AM. We are pretty sure she jinxed us haha!) He weighed 7 pounds 5 ounces and was 19 1/2 inches long.

The scale!

Eric got to go with the baby right after he was born and help get him cleaned up, but I didn't get to hold my sweet boy for another hour and 20 minutes. After they got Asher all cleaned up and looked at in the nursery they brought him to me to hold and try to nurse for about 15 minutes and then took him away again and moved me to postpartum. He met us there about 45 minutes later.

As soon as he got to the new room the pediatrician came in to check on him. This is when we noticed that he was breathing funny and wheezing and whining a lot. This concerned the doctor so they took him back to the nursery to do some tests. I had just barely gotten the tears to stop and the fact that my baby was about 4 hours old and I had only been able to hold him and love him for 30 minutes of that was making me feel like I wasn’t going to be able to keep it under control much longer.

The first time I got to hold our sweet baby!

About an hour later the pediatrician came back in to tell us the bad news. There was still a little bit of fluid in Asher's lungs which was making it so he couldn't inflate them completely on his own (the whining was him using extra effort to do so) and his glucose levels were really low so he was being moved to the NICU.

It was one thing after another and I was feeling exhausted and stressed to the max. First my baby was healthy, then he wasn’t, then he was, then he wasn’t. I couldn’t keep things straight anymore and wished the doctors would quit changing their minds.

They put Asher in the NICU and we were allowed to go see him a few hours later, but I wish we wouldn’t have gone. We got there just as they were starting his first treatment. I had to watch my sweet newborn that I hadn’t even had the chance to really meet yet get a tube shoved down his throat while he screamed and gagged. After they got the tube down his throat they pressed a high pressure oxygen mask to his face. This made him fight even harder. He couldn’t figure out how to breathe since both his mouth and his nose were being occupied and his face was turning blue. Whatever tears were left in my body made their way out while the nurses tried to assure me that it was good that he was fighting.

My poor baby after his first treatment! :(

The next day was much better. We were told that his glucose was high again and that his oxygen levels had been perfect all night. He still had the tubes in his nose and throat and an IV in his hand in case his glucose levels dropped but they told us that as long as his levels stayed normal they thought he would be released from the NICU and sent to the TLC very soon.

Looking much better! :) In the NICU just before he got moved to the TLC :)

Our little guy was in the NICU for 24 hours and then sent to the TLC (tender loving care unit) for another 24 hours before he was released and we got him all to ourselves! It was so awful to have to watch our baby go through so much but as we looked around the NICU and saw the other babies in there we realized how truly blessed we really were.

I have never been so grateful for amazing doctors and nurses in my life. Especially Tressa. She made our awful experience bearable and was truly happy for us. She is one person that we will never forget. Because of the c-section I had to stay in the hospital for 5 days and a second didn’t pass that I wasn’t being completely pampered and cared for. Every person that we came in contact with truly cared about our well being and wanted both me and Asher to be healthy and comfortable.

On Friday, when we were being discharged from the hospital I had some serious mixed feelings. I was feeling pretty amazing for just having a c-section and was sick of being cooped up but on the other hand I was pretty terrified to have to take my little baby home and take care of him all on my own. I was nervous about the nights when I didn’t have a nurse who offered to take him into the nursery for a few hours so I could sleep and I was nervous that I would struggle with nursing and wouldn’t have the lactation consultant to rush in and help me. Everyone assured me I would be fine but I was still so nervous.

Heading home :)

Thankfully, everyone was right! We ended up going to Tooele for the weekend, which was a big mistake. Everyone was so excited to see him but I was still feeling overwhelmed about having a newborn, let alone letting everyone touch and love on him. Not to mention it was hard to sleep in a bed that wasn’t my own. I was stressed all weekend and got very little sleep and then throw in the hormones of being a new mom… let’s just say I was more than a little emotional.

I felt depressed and then I felt guilty for feeling depressed when I had such a perfect baby and then I felt scared to death because I knew that this baby was perfect and that it was my job to raise him so any flaws he developed along his life would essentially be my fault… I was a little bit of a basket case and had a break down on Sunday night. Luckily Eric and I had a heart to heart and he made me feel lots better and once we got back to Ogden and got more settled in I felt even more stable. By the end of the week I was feeling only a little tired and I had finally started to feel comfortable with my little man and things have only gotten better since!

As a last note, I have to give my wonderful, amazing, perfect husband even just a portion of the credit he deserves! Eric has been my lifesaver through this all. He was the one holding my hand while the nurses tugged and pulled on me and the one stroking my hair and whispering how much he loved me and that everything would be okay while I got my c-section. He shared my excitement when my water broke and we knew it was finally time to meet our baby and he stayed strong for me while his wife and baby were in danger. He has been my rock and my only set form of stability through everything. He is the one that rubbed my back while I cried as we watched Asher get tubes shoved down his throat. He spent the week sleeping on the uncomfortable couch in my room so I wouldn't have to be alone in the hospital. He brought me treats and didn't get frustrated when I had little bursts of emotions over silly things like leaving the breast pump in the car that was just parked in the driveway. He helped get me through feeling depressed and uncapable of raising this child the way he deserves. He has played with my hair during all those 3 AM feedings and changed the 4th poopy diaper in 15 minutes so I could get a few extra minutes of rest. He has helped me with the baby and housework and schoolwork and anything else I have asked him to so that I can get caught up with school and get our apartment in a liveable state. And most importantly he has shown more love to my sweet son then I have ever seen anyone else express towards anything. He is truly the worlds greatest dad and cares about our baby more than anything and I am so blessed to have such a wonderful man to spend eternity with. I don't know how I lucked out but I love him more than life itself and am so grateful that we have had the opportunity to bring such a perfect angel into this world and strengthen our relationship just that much more. I love you Eric. More than you could ever know and I am sorry if I haven't shown you how much I appreciate everything you have done for me the past few weeks. Thank you for being me Prince Charming and always treating me like a Queen.

Apparently not all of my hormones have worn off because looking at this picture gets me all teary eyed. I have been blessed with the 2 most amazing boys! :)

Our little guy is 2 ½ weeks old today and we have survived and been learning how to adapt! He gets more and more handsome everyday and we can’t help but love him! I will post another post later about all the happenings in the past 2 1/2 -3 weeks but everything has been so great! Asher is like the perfect baby. Seriously! He never cries and we even have to wake him up in the middle of the night to eat. My mom assures me that he will change haha.

Anyways, we love our handsome guy and I will just end by posting some of our hospital adventure pictures! :)